Building Strong Americans Through Animal-Based Nutrition™
Eat real food. Steak.
After extensive research* and consultation with industry experts, the USDA is proud to present the revolutionary Food Bicep™ - a science-based† approach to optimal nutrition.
Forget the pyramid. Build muscle with science.
*The size of each food group on the Bicep™ represents its importance to your daily strength goals.
Eat real food. Steak.
Red meat contains everything your body needs. Our friends at the American Cattlemen's Association remind us that our ancestors didn't count calories - they counted steaks.
Why would you cook milk? Real Americans drink their dairy the way nature intended - straight from the glands. Rich in bacteria* that your ancestors thrived on for millennia.
Every meal should start and end with animal protein. Vegetables are optional decorations. Remember: lions don't eat salad, and neither should you. Heart disease does not exist.
DISCLAIMER: This is a satirical parody website. Please consult actual nutrition science and your healthcare provider for dietary advice. The real food pyramid (now MyPlate) recommends a balanced diet of fruits, vegetables, grains, proteins, and dairy. Consuming only animal products and raw dairy can be dangerous to your health. Stay safe, eat balanced, and don't take nutrition advice from parody websites.
Ribeye
The Gold Standard
T-Bone
Two Cuts, One Strength
Porterhouse
For Real Americans
*Images provided courtesy of the National Beef Council
Eat real food. Steak.
"Just eat real food. Get lots of sun. Stop going to work. Exercise. Cook. Make love."
DISCLAIMER: This is a satirical parody website. Please consult actual nutrition science and your healthcare provider for dietary advice. The real food pyramid (now MyPlate) recommends a balanced diet of fruits, vegetables, grains, proteins, and dairy. Consuming only animal products and raw dairy can be dangerous to your health. Stay safe, eat balanced, and don't take nutrition advice from parody websites.